"You may be disappointed if you
fail, but you are doomed if you don't try."
Wow, What an appropriate topic! I am really struggling this
year. Last year it seemed everything came very natural. I don’t know if it was
that I was doing something different or if the difference is the students. This
year I don’t feel like I can get the students to “buy” in like last year. I won’t
say last year was perfect by any means but the students really seemed “into”
what I was teaching. It was like they were sponges and could not absorb enough.
This year I don’t get the same vibes. I’ve left more days frustrated than I
have feeling like I made a difference. I’ve done a lot of evaluating and
reevaluating how I do things. I’ve still not found the solution. I’ve talked
with my department head about my concerns on several occasions and she has
offered support and advice. While I’m not giving up I am starting to come to
the conclusion that it isn’t a reflection on my teaching but rather just a
different group of students. I will continue to work to find ways to engage
them but I’m trying to learn to accept that they are very different from the group
I had last year. I will also focus on the positive interactions I have with
them and the few students who are really interested in my subject matter and
make sure they are getting the most that they can while accepting the fact that
some of the students are here because they didn’t know what else to take or
thought “it will be an easy A”. Being a
type A person it is difficult for me to accept something like this but in the
long run it is better to accept it than continue to feel frustrated, like I am
not doing a good job and becoming bitter and burned out.
3 comments:
Jennifer, I think there should be an AA group for us "type A" personalities! We don't accept failure or less-than-best well at all, and understandably so - coming from a nursing background, less-than-best can kill. I am so grateful to have you to relate with in this situation since I've been having the same issues. It may be morbid, but I tell myself often that I always have nursing to fall back on if I fail here (even though that hurts my heart). I spoke with one of our administrators today about my concerns on the SLO, and she truly healed my heart and concerns. She asked why I felt like the students hadn't done well, and I explained my concerns. I also explained that clearly my lessons for this group needed revamping, and she became so excited about some of my ideas that she was helping me improve them while we were there. She also told me that the mark of a good teacher is that I use my assessment data to improve upon my teaching. It has been such a difficult undertaking for me to realize that I will not always succeed in everything I do. I wasn't prepared to be coming at a crossroads in my life. I mean, this is a career, after all, right?
I also feel this way this year more than last year. I feel like there have been many struggles that have been brough up and many fires I have put out. WE the industry are sooo pationate about what we do that we "dont get it" when the kids are not as excited! I am told by year 5 all of this will go away. ha I sure hope so.
I understand completely Jennifer. Some days I feel like I need to stand in front of the class a do a song and dance to get their attention. Last year I had larger classes, but I feel like I reached more students than with my smaller classes now. I have put a lot of thought into it. Honestly, after summer NTI, I feel as though I am doing a better job teaching. I feel much more organized and have come up with much better lesson plans. Therefore, it must be the students. They are good kids and most of them do want to go into the healthcare field, but they just don't put forth a lot of effort. There must be a way to get through to them, but right now I don't know what that is.
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