Well, I must say I feel like a bit of my frustration from the past few weeks has begun to settle down. As I expressed with a few of you, as well as Dr. M, I believe that after spring semester I am going to put my teaching career on hold for a little while. I really enjoy seeing my kids learning, but it is increasingly difficult for me to deal with my school system. I don't know if I will not ever come back to teaching, but I do not want to be where I am at right now. After much needed advice from my NTI classmates and professors, I have decided to finish my certification and take a year or so off from teaching. Then perhaps, I can find a better and closer system to try again. I do feel blessed to have been a part of each of my students' lives. I absolutely cherish the glimmer of excitement in their eyes when they find themselves learning something new and succeeding! However, at this time I am simply exhausted with all the work and added stress of this job. My husband and I are trying to start a family, and with the stress of this job, my body is not cooperating. Also, coming from a very analytical and logical background (I studied engineering before nursing) I find it frustrating and difficult to work in an education environment...when I want to know the rules I would like to be able to go to one place and find them...not search all over the place just to find that half of what I need is missing and no one has any idea where to find the answers. I will say this though, this position has really opened my eyes and given me insight to my own adolescence. My mother and I fought like cats and dogs when I was a teenager..as many mothers and teen daughters do. :-) She would always say "you only see things black and white" and I would say "of course, it's either right or wrong". You see, my mother and my father are both educators. My mother has always been a teacher and even now works for the DOE. She has never had a job outside education so she is used to a lot of "gray" area. I never could understand how she never saw thing like the rest of the "real world" did..now I do. That was the environment she was used to and she knew nothing else. She and I have become even closer since I became a teacher, whether it's to laugh at those good 'ol days, or for me to pick her brain about a situation, or even for me to share a story about one of my students. Even though I look forward to the end of this year, I am eternally grateful to have had this opportunity. Who knows, maybe in a year or two I will come back for many years! With this new found insight, I also find new peace. I now feel like I can make it to the end of the year, and I am striving to be the best I can be for my students. Judging by how much I have written apparently I had a lot to say and get off my chest! :-) I want to end this post by stating how thankful I am to each and every one of you as my classmates and as my instructors...this has truly been a wonderful opportunity to learn and grow and I look forward to seeing what next semester has in store for all of us.